You're absolutely right, life is hard

Strength and growth come only through continuous effort and struggle

Napoleon Hill

The best decision of my life was when I said to him, “I’m keeping the baby, and aborting you.” Well, of cos not aborting his financial responsibility. I have been working on getting child support for the past three years. Hong Kong Family Courts, please work faster.

I am human. I feel upset, frustration, disappointment. Being cut out of his life while being pregnant with his child wasn’t easy. What made things worse was being wrongfully accused of defaming him as the father of my child.

Having a legal paternity test after childbirth doesn’t change anything either. A protection order was granted to him when I was 5 months post-birth. I did not fight back, I couldn’t. I was sleep-deprived, breastfeeding, and exhausted from the demands of a young infant. I felt wronged.

Hearing the cries of my young infant, I had visions of throwing him out of the window. Yes, this is what postpartum anxiety and depression do to women. Does that mean I was dangerous and unfit to be his mum? Very much yes, if I didn’t seek help, pronto.

I feel much better now. I no longer have those horrible visions of that window. Instead, I toss him up high in the sky to hear his excited giggles.

With the love and understanding of my partner(s) and son, I delve into the realm of the unknown, crossing over my comfort zone countless times to grow mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually in the new year and beyond.

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.